Unglued

Inside I am seething. I'm angry because I am not getting the respect I think I deserve. I'm feeling sad for myself too. These are signs that I actually give a damn about myself. However, the rest of the world thinks a person is spoiled for acting sorry for themselves. So I'm back and forth playing the blame game for how I FEEL I'm being treated.
Inner dialogue: I deserve it. Life is like that. Grow up, brat.
vs
I'm gonna go zombie on their asses! Rage for little reason than itself.

'never go against nature
because when you do...
to go against nature
is part of nature too'
~love and rockets

I don't wanna. I don't think so.
So here I sit, stewing in my own juices. Arms crossed with my bottom lip sticking out. I can't afford to act out my aggression. I can't make demands. I'm puny. To have no money is to have no voice. All I'm allowed to do is struggle like little people do. I don't think I'm better than anyone else and deserve more. I think EVERYONE deserves better. Oh, I do think it's just, in all fairness if some fat cats fall though. Level the playing field. Grrrr.

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